In recent weeks, I’ve been grappling with a sense of spiritual stagnation. Despite maintaining my daily meditation practice, something within feels misaligned. It’s as though my spirit is yearning for a deeper connection—a call I can hear but not yet fully understand.

Night after night, I’ve been awakened by the hauntingly beautiful sound of African Orisha chants. These melodies feel like echoes from a past life or a soothing lullaby from ancestors gently calling me home. The whispers come in the Yoruba language—a tongue I’ve never studied yet feels oddly familiar, as if it resides deep within my soul. What’s curious is that I haven’t been exposed to African music or language recently, so I know this resonance comes from Spirit. It’s a call, but to what remains a mystery.

Before the New Year, I received a download—a revelation—that this would be a year of education and discovery. In response, I’ve immersed myself in spiritual podcasts, YouTube vlogs on Ifá, Orishas, and Patakís, as well as books and audiobooks about African spiritual practices. Each step feels like uncovering a hidden truth embedded in my DNA. Although misaligned, I’m being nudged toward reconnecting with something ancient and profound—a spiritual heritage that flows through my blood.

Still, walking this path isn’t without its challenges. My father was initiated into this practice, but misconceptions cloud my understanding. My mother, who was not an initiate, often looked down upon these traditions, and her views have undoubtedly influenced me. Like many others, I’ve been conditioned to view these practices through a lens of skepticism. As much as I’m drawn to this call, fear and doubt linger, making it difficult to fully embrace the journey.

The universe, however, seems determined to guide me. I keep encountering people who practice or share knowledge about the Orishas, as if Spirit is placing them in my path to illuminate the way. The message is clear: I’m being called, yet I hesitate. My mistrust—of the call, of my guides, of my own intuition—weighs heavily on me. Perhaps this stagnation isn’t a block but a pause—a chance to exercise my free will and choose my next step.

Although I feel stuck, I can see the road ahead. It’s up to me to take that first step forward. The path is clear; I just need to trust—in myself, in Spirit, and in the process. For now, I’ll continue to learn, listen, and prepare, knowing that each small action brings me closer to alignment with my true purpose. The call is persistent, and I’m ready to answer it… even if I’m still finding my way.