This summer, I found myself constantly resisting the urge to write. Writing has always been my way of processing, a way to release everything I feel, but this time, I made a conscious decision to experience my emotions differently. I wanted to dive deeper, not just into my thoughts, but into how my body reacts and processes every sensation. I thought I was ready for some rest and a much-needed reset, but nothing could have prepared me for the transformation that unfolded over the past eight weeks.

For years, I’ve been curious about the connection between stress, trauma, and my relationship with food. It’s been a battle I’ve carried since childhood. As far back as I can remember, I’ve used food to silence the inner noise. Every emotion I didn’t want to face, every feeling I didn’t know how to handle, I buried it under layers of comfort food. Writing became my escape, but this summer, I chose a different path. Instead of escaping, I made the decision to face the truth head-on and truly listen to myself.

I decided that I wanted to live in a different body—one that wasn’t built on the foundation of trauma. No more hiding behind food. No more using it to silence the chaos. Over the past three months, I’ve dedicated myself to tuning into my body, learning to listen to its needs, recognizing my hunger cues, and identifying my emotional triggers. What I discovered was both eye-opening and humbling: food wasn’t just a comfort, it had become the center of my life, an addiction that shielded me from confronting my past, my pain, and my true self.

In peeling back those layers, I’ve shed 30 pounds. But this time, it wasn’t just about the weight. This time, I wasn’t chasing superficial goals. I wasn’t trying to fit an image or satisfy external expectations. I was shedding the invisible weight that had held me down for so long, that had kept me from becoming who I was always meant to be. This journey wasn’t easy, and it wasn’t one I could rush. But it was necessary.

For these three months, Spirit remained silent. No guidance, no whispers. They stood back, watching as I navigated this new reality on my own. And while I took each step by myself, I never felt alone. I knew that healing this relationship with my body was a vital part of my spiritual path—a path that would bring me closer to my true, authentic self.

And while my journey with food has been transformative, I cannot wait to share the trips, spiritual realizations, and visions that have come up for me during this period of rest. There’s so much to uncover, and I look forward to diving deeper into the insights I’ve gained along the way.

Being in this body, in this new state of awareness, is part of that journey. It’s a step toward reclaiming who I really am, shedding the layers that no longer serve me, and embracing the strength and clarity that come with it.