Peru had been on my bucket list for some time, but after my experience in Costa Rica, I was drawn to places that offered healing vibes. Cusco, Peru, stood out for its rich spiritual heritage. Once the capital of the Inca Empire, Cusco held profound spiritual significance. It was the heart of the Inca world, with sites like Machu Picchu, Sacsayhuamán, and Q’enqo resonating with spiritual energy. The Sacred Valley, surrounding Cusco, was revered by the Incas for its lush landscapes and sacred sites. And in Andean spirituality, Pachamama, the Mother Earth deity, was deeply respected, with rituals honoring her connection to nature still practiced.

Cusco had also become a hotspot for seekers of spiritual experiences like shamanic practices and ayahuasca ceremonies. Intrigued, I made sure to include it on my travel agenda. I’d spent as much time researching San Pedro/Wachuma as I had Ayahuasca. After my experience at Rythmia, I felt a tug, a sense that perhaps a smaller, more intimate ceremony was what I needed to truly connect with the medicine.

So, as I planned my trip to Peru, I secured a spot with a Shaman for both an ayahuasca and a San Pedro ceremony. What follows are my notes from that transformative experience.

Jenny picked me up from the hotel, and we drove for an hour into the Peruvian mountains, ascending even higher. Despite my initial nerves about the altitude, the breathtaking scenery of snow-capped mountains, winding rivers, and roaming animals captivated me. However, my bladder soon protested, and I endured the bumpy ride with a bursting bladder for 40 minutes. Along the way, we picked up the Shaman and Jenny’s mother, realizing during the journey that I was to be the sole participant in today’s ceremony. (I wanted a small ceremony but being the only one made me nervous.)

Arriving at our destination, Jenny swung open massive wooden doors leading to a small sanctuary nestled in the mountains. Rustic yet well-maintained, the place exuded a serene mountain vibe. The Shaman underwent a striking transformation as he entered a room, assuming his role with an air of ancient wisdom. Meanwhile, Jenny gave me a tour of the wellness center, showcasing its basic yet cozy amenities, including rooms for overnight stays and a maloca for ceremonies.

Before meeting the Shaman, I was instructed to meditate in a spot of my choosing. Following my intuition, I lay on the ground, basking in the sun’s warmth. As I closed my eyes, visions of an Incan figure adorned in gold—a warrior—appeared before me. Opening my eyes, I gazed directly into the sun, witnessing the energy it radiated. Grounding myself, I prepared for the journey ahead.

In the maloca, Jenny and I joined the Shaman to discuss my intentions. Despite not having specific intentions initially, the conversation unearthed emotions, particularly regarding my mother, evoking unexpected tears. The Shaman acknowledged this, indicating our focus for the ceremony, “My parents”.

Exiting the maloca into a dimly lit room, I underwent a brief medical check-up by Javier, the nurse, before commencing the ceremony. Jenny and Javier remained present throughout, ensuring my safety and providing support.

The Shaman poured 1.5 cups of the sweet-tasting Peruvian brew, signaling the start of my journey. As the medicine took effect, the Shaman’s icaros filled the air, guiding me into the realm of healing. Initially encountering swirling black snakes—an embodiment of the medicine’s energy—followed by fleeting glimpses of a lion’s face, I soon found myself immersed in a telepathic dialogue with Ayahuasca.

Ayahuasca conveyed messages of self-acceptance and forgiveness, facilitating a profound encounter with my father’s spirit. His apology for past shortcomings resonated deeply, paving the way for forgiveness and healing. Ayahuasca then revealed my assignment: to break a generational curse by embracing my mother with full forgiveness—a task I’d previously resisted. She gave me clear instructions about what I was to do. Fulling this request would break the cycle between my own daughter and me.

Aya also informed me that I needed to continue to travel, because each location would be blessed with a gift. These gifts would bring me closer to my spiritual purpose. However, her last message was stern. She advised me not to take anymore plant medicine because all the answers I seek are already within me.

Navigating waves of emotions and insights, I felt a surge of nausea, prompting the Shaman’s intervention to realign my energy. Following the purge, he shared his visions of my past life in Peru, where I existed as a beacon of energy—a moon amidst ancient ruins. Shaman felt that my visit to Peru was no coincidence, but a calling from the ancestors. A calling from a past life.

As the ceremony drew to a close, I stepped outside, greeted by the wind’s caress and the earth’s embrace. The mountains felt like old friends, welcoming me home. Though nausea briefly returned, the act of purging felt like a reciprocal exchange with Pacha Mama—an offering of gratitude for the healing received.

Guided by the Shaman, I received instructions for post-ceremony integration, including meditation and working with elemental energies. Despite moments of doubt and anxiety, I recognized these as part of the healing process, paving the way for personal growth and transformation. However, I struggled with the task that was handed to me. After not seeing my mother for over 5 years, how was I going to complete this task?