The weeks following the accident were undoubtedly the toughest I’d ever faced. It was a time when I truly began to understand how others perceived me. Surprisingly, some of those I expected to stand by me were the ones who kept their distance. It was a wake-up call. Very few reached out or checked on me, and that forced me to reflect on the kind of person I was in their eyes. My ego took a hit during my recovery, but it marked the beginning of my true journey of self-reflection.

The accident forced me to reevaluate my entire life. It made me question my worth and the depth of my connections with others. Despite considering myself somewhat of a loner, I realized how small my inner circle truly was during that time.

Beyond being a significant event, the accident became a catalyst for profound introspection. The scar near my eye became a constant reminder of my vulnerability and losing clumps of my cherished hair due to anesthesia only added to my insecurities. It was a moment where I had to confront not only my physical appearance but also how I presented myself to the world. It was the beginning of my shadow work.

Experiencing something as traumatic as the accident, I found myself cycling through the stages of grief, with anger and depression threatening to overwhelm me. However, it was acceptance—the final stage—that shifted my focus outward. It brought me back to the vision I had during the accident, those doors that seemed to beckon me forward. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was pushed into another dimension, perhaps even having experienced a near-death encounter.

Recalling the faint message I heard during that vision, I couldn’t help but think about my prior fascination with Ayahuasca and other plant medicines. I had often pondered the possibility of such an experience, but circumstances had never aligned for me to pursue it. Was the accident a message, a door leading me (or pushing me) toward something greater? Did it happen to steer me (Or push me) toward the path of exploring plant medicine? Was this my calling all along?

In the aftermath of the accident, these questions swirled in my mind, challenging me to look beyond the surface and consider the deeper meaning behind the events that had unfolded.